Remembrance of Rules Past

The transition from D&D 4e to 5e was pretty easy, mostly because 4e was such an oddball system.  If they'd been more alike I might have had a harder time remembering which rule belonged to which system.  But for me, 5e feels more like a simplified version of 3e.  It's like 3e is chess, 5e is checkers, and 4e is... I don't know, Warhammer.

I can't say I miss D&D 4e.  It was so mechanically structured that even roleplay scenarios felt forced and unnatural.  But I do like certain concepts enough that I would gladly still use them in 5e.  Heck, some mechanics were so popular that many tables continue to use them without even realizing those rules no longer exist.  

One thing about 4e is that it was so hated, that the 5e design team went out of their way to disguise anything that made it similar to 4e.  Like how you spend Hit Dice instead of Healing Surges now.  And 5e has dozens of abilities that contain the text, "Once you use this ability, you can not use it again until you have completed a (short or) long rest."  What a wordy way to say "Daily Power" or "Encounter Power".  Imagine how much ink they could have saved if they weren't afraid of using 4e terminology.

Or look at 4e's Standard/Move/Minor action economy.  To me, that is the standard RPG action economy, and I would probably use the same thing if I designed an RPG.  5e allows you to do approximately the same number of things on your turn, but it's just phrased more vaguely.  In 5e you can move and take an action, and some of the things that used to be minor actions are considered part of moving.  

Remember Double Moving?  In 4e, you could substitute lesser actions for greater actions.  So you could move again as your standard, or do a minor action instead of your move, etc.  You can still move as your action in 5e, but you have to call it "Taking the Dash Action".  If you actually use the words "I'm going to Double Move" in 5e, some pedantic snot will explain that that's not a 5e thing, and frankly I'm tired of trying to get blood out of the carpet.

And don't forget "Bloodied" - 4e had a lot of special rules that would trigger when a creature's hit points fell below half their maximum.  5e has a couple, but instead of having a word for it, it just says "when you are below half your hit point maximum" or some such.  Plenty of 5e players still say "bloodied" today, despite the term not appearing in the PHB.

I've been looking at various RPGs and picking out rules I really like.  I'm not saying they would all work in 5e.  And if I were to piece them together into one big Frankenstein's RPG - well, they probably wouldn't all complement each other.  But hell, it's my blog, and I'm going to babble about standout rules that I liked from 4e and other RPGs.

Square Fireballs (D&D 4e) - Look, 4e's system of magic was kind of silly, I know.  But admit it: You never had to argue about whether something hit or not.  If it said "area burst 3 within 20 squares", you knew exactly which creatures were affected, no protractor required.  You never had to say, "Well, this part of the circle looks like it takes up about three-eighths of the square, does that count?"

Flanking (D&D 4e) - The thing about flanking is it just feels natural.  If you gang up on an enemy, you expect a bonus.  There are math reasons that it doesn't work well in 5e, though.  Plus it defies their goal of keeping 5e's combat rules light.  

Holding or Delaying an Action (D&D 4e) - A lot of people are surprised that this is no longer a thing in 5e.  Like flanking, it was probably kept out for simplicity's sake.  But I've also heard it was because delaying actions complicates effects that last until the end of your turn.  As a DM, I would still allow it, within reason.  If nothing else, in the first round of combat, I'd allow PCs use it to rearrange their initiative order.

Called Shot (Various RPGs) - I haven't seen this since 3e (though there was an unrelated 4e feat by that name).  If a PC wants to target a specific body part, they can take a penalty to their attack roll.  Some 5e DMs allow their players to make called shots at disadvantage, but the designers discourage it.  Personally, if the player's desired effect was within reason, I might allow it.

Minions (D&D 4e) - 4e had single hit point enemies called minions, meant to annoy you with their numbers rather than to challenge you on a one-to-one basis.  1HP kobolds don't seem so weird, but when you got to higher levels, it was kind of odd to see minion Ogres and such.  But as a DM, I liked not having to track the hit points of creatures that weren't supposed to last very long in the first place.  Plus they were a great example of the "Conservation of Ninjitsu" trope.

Stat Generation (Pathfinder 2e) - I can't tell you enough how much I like the way stats are generated in P2e.  Your stats come partly from your ancestry, partly from your class, and partly from your background.  Given my personal vendetta against rolling stats, it's nice to have such a great system hard coded into the game's mechanics.

Initiative (Shadow of the Demon Lord) - There's a lot I like and don't like about SotDL, but it has one of my favorite systems for determining initiative.  No rolling, just a semi-structured way of letting people go in whatever order they want.

BFF / Rival (Various) - I've seen variations of this in several RPGs.  Basically, you designate one other PC to be your PC's best friend, and another one to be your PC's rival.  Note that "rival" doesn't necessarily mean enemy, just someone with whom they constantly compete (think Legolas and Gimli).  It doesn't matter if PC's pair off and select each other, or if player A picks player B who picks C and so on, as long as each PC has exactly one Rival and one BFF.  Whenever a PC does something spectacular (like crits the final hit on a boss), their BFF describes what happened as colorfully as possible.  Meanwhile, whenever a PC fumbles, their rival has the honor of describing their screw-up.

Simplified Stats (Warrior, Rogue & Mage) - I like simple rules.  Sometimes I think some of the stats are kind of redundant, and I'd love to try an RPG that only uses three.  Obviously this only works in a very specific kind of RPG.  

Exploding Dice (Various RPGs) - This probably isn't really compatible with D&D's math, but it sure is fun in the RPGs that use it.  Basically when you roll max on your damage die, you get to roll it again and add that in too.  If you roll max again, you can keep rolling until you stop rolling max.  So your d6 damage die might usually average you 3 or 4 damage... but sometimes you might do 38.

And now for something completely different...

Just to show both sides of the coin, here's some rules I'm glad to see gone forever.  Note that some are from editions I've never actually played, so I might have the wrong impression of them, but they still sound terrible.  Good Riddance to:

THAC0 and Hit Tables - (Early D&D) -  Once they invented the modern system of "roll a d20, add a bonus, beat a target number", there was never any reason to look back.  Even most of the "Retroclones" I've seen use modern attack rolls.  There are just some things that defy nostalgia.

Facing (Various RPGs) - This is still listed as an optional rule in 5e's DMG, but I'll never use it.  I'm sure it adds a little bit of realism, but it also adds an extra complication to battle without adding to the fun factor.

Descending BABs (D&D 3e) - By that, I mean having multiple attacks per round, but with a lower base attack bonus for each attack.  (Example: +12/+7/+2)  The system 5e uses actually works out better mathematically, as it helps keep Fighters on par with Wizards.

Level Drain (Various) - Any effect that requires you to recalculate your character sheet is annoying.  But what really annoys me is that the mechanic treats "levels" as a real existing aspect of your character, instead of just skills your character happens to acquire at the same time.

Races Being Tied To Classes (OD&D) - When they created D&D, they had no idea how much character customization would be available in later editions, so I can't really fault them for having a lack of foresight.  But when I look through older books, and see how non-human races can't be certain classes, it makes my heart hurt.  

Gold as XP (OD&D) - You used to get experience points for finding gold.  This kind of made sense at the time, since there weren't as many ways to spend your gold, so there had to be some incentive for treasure hunting.  In a sense, I see OD&D's gold as your "score".  But characters are deeper now, and not all of them are solely motivated by greed.

...aaaaand that's my list.  Feel free to comment below if I missed any rules you love or hate.

Campaign Ideas: Death in Barovia

Some people are just weird.  A few months ago I was browsing the posts in a "Curse of Strahd" group, and one of the DMs professed an odd approach to death in his campaign.  Basically he advocated permadeath.  Okay, that's fine so far.  I've seen campaigns where resurrections weren't allowed.  It's not particularly unusual.

Except, no, at his table, if a character dies, that player is out of the group.  They can't roll up a new character, they just aren't welcome at the table again until the next campaign.  Basically he's treating his campaign like a reality show.  Several people tried to explain to him why this was a bad idea, at least if he enjoys having friends, but he would not be swayed.  

Oh well.  Hopefully they had fun.  At least he wasn't proposing to kill the players in real life.

Here's the thing, though.  Curse of Strahd is a horror campaign.  Some DMs think this means they're supposed to make it as difficult as possible, but that kind of difficulty is just math.  I'm not afraid of numbers.  I haven't had bad dreams about math since high school.  Anybody can design a D&D monster with high damage dice, but that alone doesn't make it frightening.

The Curse of Strahd book devotes an entire page to tips on ramping up the creep factor ("Marks of Horror", page 7), and none of their suggestions involve making the module more deadly.  Instead, it concentrates on being extra descriptive, recommending that the DM point out any smells, shadows, and claw marks that might give greater depth to a scene.  If I ran it, I'd even have us play by candlelight and have some gothic music playing in the background.  

One of the things that makes CoS scary is the utter lack of hope.  Early in the campaign, the PCs should discover that once you enter Barovia, escape is impossible.  If they try to leave the edge of the map, the fog becomes so thick that they can barely breathe.  Even if they manage to press on through the exhaustion, no matter what direction they go through the fog, they'll just pop out somewhere else at the edge of Barovia's boundries.  Strahd's domain is inescapable.

But you really don't get a sense of just how screwed you are until the first time you die.  It's not until then that you witness the totality of Strahd's power - even in death, your spirit can't escape his cursed lands.  And this is why, IMO, it's important that you allow at least some manner of resurrection in CoS.

The first time a PC dies in your CoS campaign, try reading the following:

You find yourself floating in the air, looking down at your own body.  You can’t feel anything.  No heat, no wind, it’s as if you’re not there.  You suddenly find yourself compelled to look up toward the sky.  Most of it is obscured by thick fog, but as you watch, a hole opens up in the clouds, revealing a bright, blue sky behind it.  A beam of light shines on you, and you can feel the warmth of that beam.  You feel yourself being pulled towards the light, helpless to stop it.  You start hurtling towards it, faster and faster.  Something about the light makes you feel at peace, happy even.  Instinctively, you know you are being pulled toward your eternal reward.

But suddenly, black clouds start to coalesce, in the shape of giant skeletal hands.  The hole closes, and the beam of light vanishes.  A ghostly pair of giant red eyes opens up behind the fog.  One of the misty hands points at you.

You hear a voice.  “Leaving so soon?  But we were just getting started!  I have so much more fun planned for the days ahead.  *sigh*  But I suppose, in the spirit of fairness, I should give you a choice.  Accept my dark gift now, and I will return you to your body.  Otherwise, I will scatter the remains of your soul, eliminating all traces of your existence forever.  Make your choice.”

If the player rejects Strahd's offer, their soul is obliterated forever, and they might as well tear up their character sheet.  If the player chooses to come back to life, they have no memory of their deal with Strahd, but those red eyes haunt their nightmares until Strahd is defeated.  The other PCs didn't see anything that went on in the sky, and they're completely surprised when their fallen friend regains consciousness.  Even if the dead character had been torn to pieces, their body is now whole again.

Give the revived player one of the random gifts from the Adventurer's League "Expanded Dark Gifts" table.  Most of these curses contain both a benefit and drawback, along with a bit of body horror.  It keeps the game going, and it hints that in Barovia, there are fates worse than death.

This doesn't mean you have to keep resurrecting them this way.  I'd say Strahd is willing to revive a PC twice before he gets bored with that character and ignores their fate.  After that, they're on their own.  Maybe the rest of the party can get them to a cleric, but if not, their soul bounces around Barovia, still unable to escape to their own afterlife.  Maybe they'll be reborn as an infant to a Barovian family, or maybe they'll become a restless spirit wandering one of the area's many haunted sites.

All I'm saying is, if you use permadeath in CoS, you're robbing the module of one of its greatest horrors.  And that would be a shame.

Campaign Ideas: Start With A Bang

Typical campaign:  You all meet at an inn.  A merchant there approaches your party, tells you that he's taking a carriage full of wares to the next town tomorrow, and would like to hire you for protection.  On the way, you are attacked by goblins, the merchant's prized MacGuffin is stolen, and you have to infiltrate a goblin cave to get it back.  After killing the goblin chieftain, you find a treasure map which sets up the roots for the campaign.

Not terrible, but zzzzzzz...

If I've learned anything from video games, it's that you should stick an exciting scene right up front.  Let's look at one of my favorite games, Skyrim.  It's starts with you on your way to be executed.  As the executioner raises his axe, a dragon swoops down and attacks the site, and the scene erupts into chaos.  You spend the next few minutes running around, avoiding the creature's fire.  Every time you think you've found a safe spot, the dragon knocks down a wall and breathes fire in your direction.

It's very cinematic, and gets your blood pumping right off the bat.  Of course the scene is actually very easy, and is scripted in such a way that you're never really in much danger.  But at the time it very much feels like you could die at any second.

Another good example is The Last of Us.  The first few minutes have you watching the world fall apart around you, peering through car windows as your father drives you through the early stages of a zombie apocalypse.  Eventually you have to get out and continue on foot, running through the streets while crowds of panicked civilians flee around you.  It's one of the most exciting scenes I've seen in a game, and it's right there in the first fifteen minutes.

Meanwhile, I'm looking back at most of the D&D campaigns I've been in, as both a player and as a DM, and the openings are usually pretty subdued.  More than one started like I describe above, with the PCs meeting at a inn, and/or being hired to guard a caravan.  

Shattered Star began with us receiving a summons to meet with our questgiver at her mansion, to discuss a missing artifact.  Our Scarred Lands campaign began with us attending a festival, which reminded me of the opening of Chrono Trigger.  The Artifact Hunters campaign also started with us preparing for a big social event.

Dragon's Demand had an excellent opening.  We were attending an auction, when it was attacked by several batlike creatures and a drake.  As we finished off these monsters, a giant black dragon swooped down onto a nearby roof, issuing an ultimatum for the town.  With a booming voice, he gave the town two weeks to fulfill a debt.  It was an epic scene, an image that will be burned into my mind forever...  except, no, wait, that didn't happen until our eighth session.  

Session one actually started with... let's see... ah, we were hired to guard a caravan.  Yeah.  See, that's just disappointing.  The title scene should have happened in session one.  Yeah, they probably would have had to change the dragon's deadline to a month or more instead of two weeks, so the PCs would have more time to level up before the climax.  But it would have been a much stronger opening that would make sure the players looked forward to coming back each week.

I'm not blaming any of my DMs, and most of these were published adventures anyway.  But I think module writers shy away from cinematic openings because they're afraid of making an encounter the PCs won't survive.  But there are ways to separate the PCs from the danger without it looking too obvious.

Take the Skyrim scenario, for instance.  Let's say your level 1 party arrives in town just as a huge dragon lands in the town square.  That doesn't mean the party has to fight the dragon.  They can treat it as a series of skill challenges as they run through the alleys, avoiding flaming debris, helping random citizens, and so on.  

If they do fight the dragon, that doesn't mean the dragon even notices their pitiful efforts, as the monster concentrates its attacks on the much more dangerous town guards.  Have the dragon destroy the town around the PCs, and then fly off without even acknowledging their presence.  

The PCs still get to be heroes as they help tend to wounded, and rescue people trapped in their collapsed houses.  Maybe they'll get sent to some of the surrounding towns to seek aid, doing some sidequests to gain a level or two.  Then, they're given their first real quest:  Find out who summoned the dragon.  They won't fight the dragon itself until many levels later, but giving them this early taste of the later threat is really tantalizing. 

So my current goal, next time I start a new campaign, is to have a really memorable first session.  Instead of just having everyone meet at an inn, maybe they'll meet at an inn that immediately erupts into flames, while masked thieves raid the place looking for something.  Or when the merchant starts to lead them over to the caravan they've been hired to guard, one of the wagons is suddenly lifted off the ground by a giant bird, the first of a flock that terrorizes the town. 

But from now on, when I DM, I want to treat it like a movie.  I want an exciting incident to happen within the first few minutes of gameplay, and I want that incident to be big enough to make a lasting impression.  The PCs can introduce themselves to each other after things calm down, but I'm going to give them a taste of excitement first.

Racism in D&D

I generally save politics for my personal blog, and confine this one to more light-hearted RPG babble.  But there's been a lot of social activism in the RPG world this year.  Examples include the Combat Wheelchair, a podcast getting cancelled for themes of sexual assault, and various RPG companies receiving criticism for sexism in the workplace.

One thing I'm seeing more of is people calling out the inherent racism hard-coded into D&D's rules.  Even the word "race" itself seems to be on its way out, as several of the newer RPGs favor less problematic terms like "ancestry" or "heritage" instead.  D&D has always used "race" in a way that many deem inaccurate, as what they call race is actually closer to species.

My thoughts?  Well, I can't say I'm comfortable dissecting the subject of racism, not really having experienced it first hand.  The internet doesn't need another white person's opinion on what should or shouldn't piss off people of color.  So take my ramblings with a grain of salt.  

Personally I think that in a world with multiple types of sapient creatures, the word "race" could come to mean "species" instead of ethnicity.  But I don't feel like explaining that to every D&D newcomer, so it's probably easier to use a more accurate term.  I'll be perfectly happy if the next D&D book refers to races as "ancestries" or whatever, though a certain segment of fans will probably pitch a fit.  You can't please everyone.

Another thing that is bugging people is the concept of "always evil" races.  It would be one thing if they said the evil Goddess Lolth created the Drow, and part of her spirit resides in every one of her creations and their descendants, and therefore they are incurably evil.  Because then the entire species would just be puppets controlled by an obviously evil entity.  But the minute you introduce a single good Drow, you break that rule.  The existence of a good Drow reintroduces free will into the species, which means PCs can no longer slaughter every Drow on sight.

And then there's Orcs.  Now, Orcs exist in D&D because the PCs need an enemy.  They are the Stormtroopers of D&D, an army of warriors you can attack without worrying about screwing up your alignment.  And if D&D had kept Orcs as unrepentant killing machines, mindless monsters who just happen to wear clothes and use weapons, then there might not be a problem.  

But the various rulebooks and novels go back and forth on Orc civilization.  Sometimes they're irredeemably evil, but sometimes they're more like Star Trek's Klingons - a complex society that fetishizes war and has trouble getting along with other civilizations.  And just like the Klingons, as the lore has evolved over the years, it's become harder to justify thinking of Orcs as an evil race.

Obviously, context is everything.  If you encounter an Orc warband standing in the middle of the burning village they just razed, you don't need to ask each one, "Are you good or evil" before you slay them.  But if you see a single Orc walking through a forest, or find one tied up in the dungeon you're exploring, you might want to assess the situation before activating instant kill mode.

A possible patch for this is to make it obvious what god the enemy worships.  Tell your players up front, "Unless I say otherwise, every Orc you see is wearing the symbol of Gruumsh, an evil god of war."  It's pretty safe to assume that if you see a cultist wearing the symbol of Bane on his robes, you can shoot first without karmic penalty.  Consider it preemptive self-defense - anyone wearing a symbol of evil would have no problem killing you if they see you first.  It's not the best solution, but it beats "Hey, it's an Orc, let's kill it because it's an Orc."

Racial ability scores are also causing an uproar.  It's one thing to say that the average Half-Orc is stronger than the average Halfling.  But saying Gnomes are smarter than Dwarves is more problematic, especially since some of these races are uncomfortably similar to real world nationalities.  If both are sapient humanoids, then surely their intelligence will be based more on study than genetics, right?

And what about charisma?  Doesn't it seem like you would find your own species the most charismatic?  Isn't it weird that a Dwarf would find a Tiefling more charismatic than another Dwarf?  If a Half-Orc's culture considers a burp to be a compliment, they're not going to be charmed by the Half-Elf's table manners.

There is a document on the Dungeon Masters Guild website called "Ancestry & Culture: An Alternative to Race in 5e" that does a pretty good job of fixing this problem.  It separates each race's bonuses into Ancestral traits and Cultural traits.  Anything that is tied to genetics is Ancestral.  That includes things like size, speed, and innate abilities like a Dragonborn's breath weapon.  Cultural traits include learned abilities like stat bonuses, languages, and skills.  You can take any combination of Ancestral and Cultural traits, which opens up the possibility of cross-cultural characters, like a Dwarf that was raised by Elves.

So given the above, is it truly realistic that a 3 foot tall Halfling could start with higher strength than a 7 foot tall Half-Orc?  Or more specifically, would a Halfling raised by Half-Orcs be stronger than a Half-Orc raised by Halflings?  Surely Half-Orcs have a genetic head start, right?  But the Halfling would have spent more time exercising, just to keep up with their peers.  I don't know, but I do have this one friend who is a foot shorter than me, and he could probably break me in half.  So size isn't everything.

And how does one train up constitution?  You can exercise your muscles and your mind, you can learn social graces, there's all kinds of ways to improve your dexterity, but IMO it seems like constitution would be genetic.  However, this system really only works if all six stats are Cultural traits, so I guess Dwarven upbringing toughens you up.  Must be all that Dwarven ale.

Realistic or not, balanced or not, I do think that "Ancestry & Culture" fixes more problems than it causes.  Even if you're not into it for the "wokeness" of the document, it still has some great options for those who want to fine tune their character to a degree not possible with the PHB alone.  Plus it includes a couple of bonus adventures that take place in multicultural settings.  So check it out, it's worth a look.

An upcoming official D&D book, "Tasha's Cauldron of Everything", also appears to address the problem.  I'm pretty hyped for this book.  It looks a lot like "Xanathar's Guide to Everything", which is my favorite 5e supplement.  Even if a lot of the content was already published in Unearthed Arcana, it will be nice to have the updated versions all in one place.

Supposedly it has new character creation rules that take some of the racism out of it.  I imagine their solution will be similar to the one in Ancestry & Culture, but I can't say for sure.  Bigots are already whining about the book being too politically correct or whatever, despite the fact that the new rules are optional.

Imagine being such a bigot that you don't even want them publishing a completely optional book, just because it doesn't bow down to your narrow worldview.  I've met so many great people while playing D&D, that I sometimes forget that the hobby also draws a lot of toxic asshats.  But why should I be surprised?  D&D creator Gary Gygax himself was no saint, assuming this pic is genuine:

So maybe bigotry is so deeply ingrained in the system that it's impossible to root out.  But I refuse to believe that.  I think the game has become more enlightened in recent years, even if it does have a ways to go.  With any luck, the creators will continue to listen to the more inclusive part of their fanbase, instead of caving to the more toxic side.

Only time will tell.

The Ridiculous Hills We Die On

It's funny the things we consider deal breakers.  A while back I posted my impressions of Pathfinder 2e.  I listed several of the rules that stood out to me, some good, some bad.  While I don't still don't think I'd like it as much as D&D 5e, I do want to give P2e another chance.  

Of all the rules I looked at, only a couple really feel like barriers to my enjoyment.  The first is the overabundance of feats.  It's not that I dislike feats, it's just that there's so many of them, and they're so wordy.  Of course I'm going to read every available feat before I pick one, which means I'll take forever to create my character or level up.  

The good news is that it's only a problem while building my character, so it doesn't slow down gameplay.  And I can always look up character builds online if I don't want to think about it.  The PHB even has its own suggested builds, which is a wonderful time saver.

The bigger issue is the one that shows how crazy I really am.  Movement.  I just don't like 5,10,5,10 diagonal movement.  Moving is fundamentally one of the simplest actions one can make in an RPG, and therefore it should be kept as easy as possible.  Having to keep track of how many diagonal squares I've moved so far breaks the immersion for me.  

Look, you can whine about realism all you want, but the fact is, grid-based battles are going to be abstract no matter what you do.  I mean, you can move in way more than eight directions in real life.  Hell, everything about battle is an abstraction.  Hit points represent a combination of stamina, damage taken, luck, spirit, and probably even your will to live.  And do you really think every fireball is going to make a perfect circle of flames?

It's not like moving diagonally actually gives you any sort of advantage.  As long as the monsters can move diagonally too, then everyone's on the same footing.  There are just some shortcuts we take in order to streamline the game, some acceptable breaks from reality that keep us from tearing our hair out at the abundance of rules.  

If it helps you, don't think of a square as being exactly five feet.  Think of them as closer to four feet.  You're moving four feet whenever you move North, South, East, or West, and you're moving 5.66 feet (thank you, internet) when you move diagonally.  If you use both NSWE and diagonal movement on your turn, then you probably moved an average of five feet per square.  

For example, if your character can move 30 feet, just go North twice and diagonal four times.  That adds up to 30.64 feet, which is close enough IMO.  Then you can pat yourself on the back for being more realistic, and the rest of the table doesn't have to share your pedantry.

It's not like that's my only unreasonable RPG pet peeve.  It's just that P2e manages to avoid most of my other grievances.  I've already ranted about my feelings on rolling stats, and P2e pleases me by having an absolutely beautiful system for generating your ability scores.  I don't like the slow healing in older editions, but P2e has the "Treat Wounds" skill that should speed things up a bit.  I'm not in love with P2e's "bulk" system for encumbrance, but I'm also not one of those players who loots everything they see.

So while a lot of P2e's changes make me raise my eyebrow a little, the only one that drives me nuts is one that's true of a lot of RPGs.  Heck, even my beloved D&D 5e lists 5,10,5 as an optional rule in the DMG.  I freely admit that it's a silly objection, and in my defense, it wouldn't actually stop me from playing in a P2e campaign.  I'd accept the rule and make the best of it.  But I'd still roll my eyes whenever I had to move diagonally in battle.

Daggerford: Dino Crisis

Game Date: 8/22/2020

Location: Roll20
Campaign: Daggerford, Session 2

System: D&D 5e
DM: Rusty

The Party:

Ezmerelda (Christy) Halfling Rogue

Khemed (Mike) Half-Elf Wizard

Neven (Steve) Elf Monk

Vanya (Matt) Half-Elf Bard 

Boo - Neven's riding lizard

The Session:

After last session, we spent about a month of downtime.  Vanya used her time to get to know local nobles, and made a comfortable living as an entertainer.  Neven spent the month crafting healing potions, while Khemed sought out local spellcasters.  Ezmerelda mostly hung out in graveyards and tried to get in contact with local thieves.

Azul was out sick from food poisoning, but the rest of were assigned road guard duty.  We were ordered to travel to The Way Inn and makes sure conditions were safe for a caravan that would be coming through.  We left Daggerford early in the morning, and reached our first stop, Gillan's Hill, around mid-day.  After a bit of shopping, we rode on, and we reached Liam's Hold around nightfall.

We stayed at Liam's Hold overnight, where Vanya gave a very bad performance (her voice was tired from the trip).  The next morning we continued our journey, reaching a campsite late in the day.  We saw some lizard tracks nearby.  We investigated, and found that the tracks are similar to the Allosaurus we fought last session.

During the night, we were attacked by a pair of Allosauruses.  This was a lot tougher without Azul.  Neven took the most damage, but he also delivered both killing blows.  Last session Khemed acquired a necklace made of dinosaur teeth, which we discovered was now glowing.  Khemed studied the necklace and realized that it is a necklace of Allosaurus control.

We finished our rest, and hit the trail.  After riding about half the day, we reached the small town of Bowshot. We asked around about dinosaur activity in the area, and learned that something seems to be driving the Allosauruses out of the swamps.  Then we continued to ride until we reached the The Way Inn.  

After dinner we met with caravan leader Meldar, who hired us as escorts back to Daggerford.  We spent the night at the inn, and set out with the caravan the following morning.  The caravan was slower than our horses, and they estimated it would take about seven days for us to reach Daggerford.  Since this would put us behind schedule, we sent Khemed ahead to let our superiors know we would be late.

The caravan reached Bowshot the first day, and that Allosaurus-infested campsite the second.  During the night we were attacked by goblins and orcs.  Our chances looked pretty bleak at first, but then Khemed came running back in on the back of an Allosaurus.  He used a sleep spell to take out three goblins, and his dino mount attacked the orcs.  Unfortunately, the orcs managed to bring the dinosuar down within a few turns, but it was still a powerful image.

Khemed made one orc flee using a Command spell.  Ezmerelda went down from an orc's great axe.  Vanya finished off one orc with a particularly vicious insult, and Neven killed the final orc.  Once the orcs were gone, the final goblin fled.  It was too late to save Ezmerelda, but she came back to life as a Revenant.

We rode back to Daggerford, and explained our delay to our commanding officer.  After debriefing, we headed to the Shining River Tavern, where Meldar paid us and gave us some gifts:  A map, a fine bronze dagger, a wand of Detect Magic, and some potion bottles - three doses of Gaseous Form and one dose of Heroism.  We each received 467 XP, bringing us up to 803 XP.

About five weeks later we were going about our daily routine, to find the town was abuzz with talk of an execution.  A Red Wizard of Thay had been been found guilty of murder, and was brought to Daggerford to be hanged.  Khemed and Ezmerelda attended the execution.  Shortly thereafter, we received news that Cromm's Hold was being attacked by a black dragon.  Volunteers were sought to ride out to their rescue.

We ended the session there.  Even though we're about 100 xp short, we went ahead and leveled up our characters to level 3.

My RPG Bucket List

I recently started playing in a new campaign, as a Bard.  It's my first Bard in 5e, despite Bards being my favorite class in previous editions.  So I can finally cross "5e Bard" off my bucket list.  I thought I'd list a few more things I've been wanting to play.  Hopefully I can check these off eventually.  I'll probably keep editing this blog as I think of more.

Characters I Want To Play:

Fairy/Pixie/Sprite - Don't judge me, but I like fey characters.  There was a playable pixie race in one of the later 4e books, but we stopped playing 4e before I got a chance to play one.  I have no desire to ever play 4e again, but I wish 5e would get an official fairy race at some point.  Of course, I could always just play Shadow of the Demon Lord.

Tabaxi - I'm a huge cat lover.  When I was a kid, I even drew comics about anthropomorphic cats that looked pretty similar to the Tabaxi.  I would bet that one of my next three 5e characters ends up being a Tabaxi.

Warlock - Of all the classes I've never played, Warlock is probably my favorite.  My next character might just be a Tabaxi Warlock, which would kill two birds with one stone.

Divine Soul Sorcerer - From Xanathar's. Sorcs are one of my favorite classes, and I like it when non-healing classes are given the option to do a bit of healing.  I've been wanting to try this subclass for a while.

Cleric or Paladin of Sune - I think the concepts of Love and Beauty are underrated in D&D.  Smart characters tend to worship brainy gods, strong characters tend to worship the war gods, and sneaky characters tend to worship luck gods.  It's trite, but I've always wanted to play a character that believes in using the power of love to vanquish evil.

Settings/Campaigns/RPGs I Want To Play Or Run:

Spelljammer - God help me, but Spelljammer is so goofy looking, I want to give it a try sometime.  I have no desire to use the AD&D based rules, but if they ever make a 5e version, I'm going to be all over it.

Curse of Strahd - This is my favorite published 5e module.  I've read it cover to cover, but I don't think that would spoil much because some of the story's elements are random.  If I ran it as a DM, I'd really want to go all out - candles, music, etc.  I'm not sure I could pull it off, but I'd like to try.  But not until we're able to start playing in person again.

Expedition to Barrier Peaks - A classic D&D adventure that mixes in some sci-fi elements.  I'd be happy to play it or run it.  There's a 5e version available from Goodman Games.

Star Wars - Let's face it, Star Wars is my life.  There have been several Star Wars RPGs, but I've never played one.  I came really close to getting into a Star Wars campaign right before I started playing D&D 4e.  Currently there's a very well done fan-made SW RPG based on D&D 5e, and I'd really like to try it someday.  

Alien RPG - Alien and Aliens are two of my favorite movies.  Last year they released a new Alien RPG.  I've read it, and it does a good job of capturing the feel of the movies.  It has two modes - a cinematic mode designed for one-shots, and a more fleshed out version for longer campaigns.  I don't know if I'd be up for a full campaign, but I'd love to try the cinematic mode.

My homebrew campaign - I've run a campaign before, but honestly, it was really more like a series of one-shots that happened to use the same characters.  I've been writing a campaign lately, designing a setting and an organization for the PCs to join.  I'd love to run it someday, as an actual long-running campaign, with a reliable group.  I'm not the best DM, and I would prefer to run it for inexperienced players.

Keep It Simple Stupid

Scouting ahead, the party rogue tiptoes through the dungeon.  She hears a loud snoring on the other side of a partially open door.  Carefully slipping through the doorway, she sees a sleeping orc.  Scattered about the room are several empty wine bottles, and she can smell the alcohol on the orc's breath from here.  While killing a sleeping foe isn't exactly sporting, she can't risk leaving any of them alive.  She draws her dagger and holds it to the monster's throat...

What happens next?   Well, that depends on the edition.  In some RPGs, the rogue gets a free hit in before initiative is rolled.  Or maybe initiative is rolled right away, but the orc can't act in the first round.  Maybe the rogue gets advantage on the roll, maybe she auto crits, maybe she gets some sort of "coup de grace" bonus.  In some editions, the orc's armor makes the AC so high that the rogue still misses, even though she was holding the dagger to the orc's bare throat.

If I were the DM, she wouldn't even have to roll.  Not to attack, not for damage.  A single drunk, sleeping orc with an exposed throat does not present enough of a challenge to warrant a roll.  IMO, that would be a roleplay scenario.  But some DMs want to roll for everything.  For them, as soon as a weapon is drawn, it's a combat scenario.

Note that I'm not here to tell anyone that they're having fun wrong.  Whatever is fun for you is your business, assuming the rest of the table is having fun too.  Most of my rambling rants are just me thinking out loud, and musing about things I'd like to see.  It's not my place to criticize what other people enjoy, though I probably do it more than I mean to.

A few months ago I posted a blog on Simplified Death and Dying Rules, which got a bit of negative feedback.  Granted, the internet is a minefield.  I could tweet "kittens are cute" and get 100 responses claiming I hate dogs.  

But regarding my blog about dying rules, I wasn't suggesting they change the rules in 5e or any other existing system.  It was more of a general "If I were to design an RPG" kind of thing.  I think about that a lot, what elements I would put in an RPG.  

My primary goal would be to keep the rules as simple as possible, and keep the character sheets small.  I'd love to have all my stats printed on a playing card.  I'd cut out D&D's system of having both stats and stat bonuses, and just use the bonuses.  I'd also trim the six stats down to three.

There's an indie RPG called "Warrior, Rogue, and Mage" which gives you three stats: Warrior, Rogue, and Mage.  If you're rolling a check that is something a Rogue would do (like sneaking), you roll the die and add your Rogue stat.  Attacking with an axe?  Roll your Warrior stat.  And so on.  I haven't played it, but I can get behind the idea.  Though I think they missed the boat by not calling it "WTF" (Wizard, Thief, Fighter).

For my own RPG, I think I'd go with the stats "Brains, Brawn, and Style".  Brains would be a combo of INT & WIS, Brawn would be STR & CON, and Style would be DEX & CHA.  Instead of a long list of skills taking up room on the character sheet, I'd probably just have you roll one of the three main stats for whatever skill they govern.  

I'd also reduce the spell list to remove redundancies, instead turning the variations into customizations.  Like instead of Acid Splash, Fireball, Magic Missile, etc, you'd have one basic projectile spell.  You would decide if it's fire, acid, etc. Higher level customizations of the same spell would change things like how many squares it hits, whether it's multiple projectiles, whether it auto-hits, if it leaves a zone, overall range, ongoing damage, status effects, and so on.

Similarly, all healing spells would be reduced to a single spell, with variations for range, whether it heals other status effects, raises the dead, etc.  The D&D 5e PHB's chapter on spells is 82 pages long.  I bet my own RPG wouldn't need more than 10 pages of spells.

A lot of people look at the size of an RPG's rulebook and are reluctant to learn the hobby.  I believe that at its core, D&D is a very simple game.  The PHB might be over 300 pages long, but most people don't use more than twenty pages of it.  Personally I think Monopoly is harder to learn.  Someday I want to run an RPG where the rulebook isn't much thicker than that of a board game.

But then we have powergamers and rules lawyers.  I honestly believe that 70% of the rules are just patches to keep certain players from exploiting the rules.  And another 20% is there to keep killer DMs from going on a power trip.  That final 10% is all that's needed to run the game, and in the perfect gaming group, that 10% is all they'd need to print.

So when I say, "With the right group, you barely need dying rules at all," that's all I mean.  It's not that I think D&D overdid dying rules, or that I get confused by all of Pathfinder 2E's rules, or that my current group is anything less than perfect.  I'm just saying that....sometime in the future.... in addition to several dozen other RPGs I'd like to play... I want to try a truly simple RPG, with a group that is just as enthusiastic as I am to try it.

Daggerford Militia: First Session

Game Date: 8/8/2020
Location: Roll20
Campaign: Daggerford, Session 1

System: D&D 5e
DM: Rusty

The Party:

Azul (Cliff) Dragonborn Fighter

Ezmerelda (Christy) Halfling Rogue

Khemed (Mike) Half-Elf Wizard

Neven (Steve) Elf Monk

Vanya (Matt) Half-Elf Bard

The Session:

We began the story in Daggerford, a town of about 300 people.  If you live in Daggerford for more than a couple of weeks, they ask you to serve some time in the militia.  Azul is our drill sergeant, and he was running us through some exercises when he was interrupted.  A man had ridden in from nearby Cromm's Hold, and collapsed from his wounds.

Azul led us to Cromm's Hold to learn what was going on.  We arrived and saw that there had recently been a battle against some lizard men.  We helped put out some fires and tended to the wounded.  The survivors informed us that Baron Cromm had charged into the nearby Lizard Marshes to deal some justice to the lizardfolk.

Azul sent word back to Daggorford, then led us into the marshes to find the Baron.  During our trek, a pterosaur swooped out of the sky and tried to make off with Esmerelda.  We killed it with ranged attacks, and Vanya healed the Rogue.

We came to the site of a battle, and discovered the bodies of the Baron (well, half of him) and his troops.  They had been killed by dinosaurs.  The Baron's magical gauntlets and ring were missing, and the other soldiers appeared to be missing their equipment as well.

Another pterodon scoped us out, but we scared it off.  Then a bloody allosaurus stomped toward us and attacked.  It wasn't easy, but we managed to bring it down.  While riding away, Vanya's horse got stuck in quicksand, but we managed to pull it out.

After riding a bit further, we found a band of heavily armed lizard men.  These were wearing different colors than the ones that attacked Cromm's Hold.  Azul spoke to their leader, "Red-Eye".  He was impressed by Azul (dragonborn are rare in this time period), and had no quarrel with us.  He told us that it was the "Blue Feather" tribe who had attacked Cromm's Hold.  We went on our way in peace.

Farther on, we encountered five of the Blue Feather lizard men.  It was a decent battle.  We took some damage, but eventually killed all but one of them.  The last one fled into the swamps, despite our best efforts to fire after him.  

We returned to where we found the Baron's body and took a short rest.  Then we returned to Cromm's Hold, gave them the body, and let them know what happened.  We took a long rest in town, recieved 337 xp, and leveled up.  The following day we returned to the swamps.

We came across a weird lizardlike creature, grazing, and wearing a saddle.  Neven approached it, and fed it some of his rations.  The lizard led us to Red-Eye's camp, and Red-Eye sold the lizard to Neven as a mount.  We asked them for more information about the Blue Feather tribe, and they told us about the tribe's location and habits.

They told us that the Blue Feather tribe probably consisted of about 50-100 lizardfolk, which is more than we wanted to fight.  They offered to send out some scouts and let us know what else the Blue Feathers were doing, and we decided to return to Daggerford for reinforcements.  

We ended the session there.  This was my first time playing a session on Roll20, and despite a few connection issues, I think it worked out pretty well.  There is a bit of a learning curve, and it slowed down the battles a little bit, but overall it was fun.  I do miss minis, thought.  

Character Notes - Vanya Bennett

Vanya Bennett

Half-Elf Bard

Alignment: Chaotic Good

Appearance: Fair skin, blonde hair.  Likes to braid colorful ribbons into her hair.  

Background: The spoiled offspring of wealthy landowners, Vanya was trained by some of the finest musicians. But when her parents lost their fortune, Vanya set out on her own to see the world and become a famous performer.

Personality: She is a bit egotistical but has a kind heart.  She likes being the center of attention.  She thinks her performances make the world a better place.

Inspiration: Marsha Brady.  Hear me out.  I was having trouble reconciling her Good alignment with her self-centered attitude.  Then I thought of the Brady Bunch.  Marsha is easily the worst of the Brady kids, always caring more about her looks than people's feelings.  And yet, even the worst Brady kid is still more compassionate than the average person.  

Vanya wants to help people.  Whether it's because she actually cares, or because she wants the accolades of being a hero, the end result is the same.  And I believe she has the potential to grow more depth as the campaign goes on.

Name: I came up with her name by playing with the word "Vanity".  Originally I named her "Vanara", but I never could remember it.  So I changed it to Vanya.  The surname "Bennett" means "Blessed".

Future Levels: Assuming Roll20 lets me add "custom" subclasses, I plan to go with the College of Glamour (from Xanathar's) at level 3.

Story: All I know about the campaign so far is that we're starting out as members of the Daggerford Militia.  Vanya doesn't seem like the soldier type, but militia can always use healers.  I thought it might be funny if there was a call for Clerics, and she signed up pretending to be a Cleric (of Sune).  

Here's the timeline I'm working with, assuming nothing contradicts with how the campaign starts out:

Vanya's parents lose their fortune.  I haven't really settled on what happened, I'm thinking her entire town might have been razed by Orcs or whatever enemy army is active in the area.  Or maybe her parents just made some bad investments.  But she left with their blessing, because they wanted to save her from dealing with their problems, and they even gave her some traveling money.

Vanya had already been wanting to see the world and pursue a music career, so she heads to the most cosmopolitan place she knows, Waterdeep.  She has trouble making it in Waterdeep because, well let's face it, everybody heads to Waterdeep.  It's such a big city, her name is drowned out in a sea of aspiring bards.

So she heads to Daggerford, which smaller, and close enough to Waterdeep to where she can head back when she wants to.  She thinks that if she can make a name for herself here, eventually her fame will travel up to Waterdeep via travelling caravans and whatnot.  

But by now, she's used up her money.  She decides to look for more stable work so she can eat, and plans to pursue her dreams on her time off.  And that's when she hears that the militia is hiring.

New Game... Finally

Looks like I might finally start gaming again soon.  My former DM is running an online 5e game, every other week.  I've never played a tabletop game in cyberspace before, so it should be an interesting experience.  I think we're using a combination of Roll20 and Discord. 

The party so far:  Dragonborn Fighter, Halfling Rogue, Half-Elf Wizard, Elf Monk, and my character is a Half-Elf Bard.  I've always loved bards, but this will be my first time playing one in 5e.  I can't wait to see how it goes.

As usual, I'll keep this blog updated with session recaps.  Wish me luck!

Saving The Tomb of Horrors

The Tomb of Horrors is one of the most well-known D&D modules.  However, it has not stood the test of time.  It hearkens back to the days of killer DMs and was intentionally designed to be as deadly as possible.  Some people still consider this a good time, and more power to them.  But I'd like to think that the newest generation of players prefers a good story to a bloodbath.

There's a great blog here about why this module isn't particularly fun (actually his exact words are "worst, shittiest, most disgusting piece of pig vomit ever published").  And I agree, ToH should probably be avoided by most modern groups.  But I think there is some appeal to unusually deadly dungeons.

Everyone knows that I'm not into hardcore campaigns.  But if you go into a session knowing it's going to be deadly, with a stack of characters you're not attached to, it could be a great time.  Much like Dragon's Lair, and it could be fun to go through it just to see all the different ways you can die.  DMDave recently posted a "Neverending Dungeon" module that's so deadly that it's practically a Roguelike, and it looks pretty fun.  I could see taking a similar approach to the Tomb of Horrors.

Tomb of Horrors is a very trap-heavy dungeon.  I don't really have a problem with that, but I prefer traps that require actual problem-solving skills to detect and dismantle.  An awful lot of ToH's traps rely on random chance, and many are instant-death traps.  This makes playing the module more like gambling than storytelling, though that's not a deal breaker.

Overuse of traps creates paranoid players.  I've seen old school gamers who tap every tile with a ten-foot pole, and use their other hand to dangle string to detect wind currents.  Remember that epic scene in Fellowship of the Ring when they tapped every tile with a pole because they were afraid it might be trapped?  Me neither.  It's a silly visual, and it makes games tedious.

I've seen DMs get frustrated at players who slow down the game by over investigating.  Sometimes these are the same DMs who turned them paranoid by making every third chest a mimic.  If you do this to your players, you have no right to complain about what they become.

But if you do use a lot of traps, just remember to make them clever, make them detectable, and make them survivable.  Any idiot can randomly declare "the floor opens up and drops you in the lava."  There should always be clues.  A player should never have to flip a coin to decide whether to pull the lever left or right, especially if a wrong pull means instant death.

I want to look at a couple of ToH's specific traps more in-depth.  Let's start with the Arch of Mist.  One of the first doorways you come across is filled with mists.  As the players approach the arch, three of the stones glow in different colors, hinting that you should press the stones before entering the arch.

If you enter the arch without pressing the stones, you'll be teleported to a prison area.  If you press the stones in the right order, the mists will clear.  Entering the arch while clear will teleport you to one of two other locations, depending on whether you are standing on the two-foot wide path of red tiles on the floor.

It's not a particularly deadly trap.  Even the worst result just sends you to a prison room, where another badly-clued puzzle can either help you escape or get you killed.  The problem with the Arch of Mist is that there's no real hints at the order to press the tiles.  It's an "experiment until you win" puzzle, and one of many in the dungeon.

The intro to the original version of Tomb of Horrors stressed that "this is a thinking person's module" and not suitable for "hack and slay" groups.  Except very few of the puzzles actually require problem solving skills.  You try the wrong thing, it doesn't work, you try the right thing.  If you get killed, you pull out another character and try again.  This "brute force" approach would be great for a first level dungeon when you have a stack of pregens ready, but the original module was designed for character levels 10-14.  That's much too late in a campaign to die from bad dungeon design.

My other issue with the Arch of Mist is having to stay on the path for a better result.  See, different players go into different degrees of detail when describing what they're doing and when.  I've seen players who act out the way they sling their satchel as they turn, how they lean against the wall with their elbow, and how they sit by the fountain with one ankle resting on their knee.  And I've seen other players who just say, "yeah, I'm in the room too."

When walking through the entrance hall of the Tomb of Horrors, some players are going to resolve to stay on the red tiles.  Some will do this by describing every five feet of movement in detail, and others are going to say "I stay on the red path" once at the beginning of the hall, and never mention it again.  When the latter reach the Arch, the DM might ask "Are you still on the red path?"

That kind of question is always a red flag, and the player will decide right then whether they had been on the red path the whole time.  Or the DM might not ask, and base it on whether they remember the PC mentioning they were on the path before.  This is the kind of thing that leads to arguments about who said what.

My fix:  I'd have the red path stop at the entrance to the Arch, and leave it out of the puzzle.  If you enter the Arch without pressing anything, you appear back at the tomb's entrance.  Enter after pressing the wrong combination, you teleport to the prison.  Enter after pressing the right combination, you go the further into the dungeon.

I would have an actual clue somewhere about the correct combination.  The colors are yellow, blue, and orange.  So how about we make the correct combination Blue-Orange-Yellow, and have a clue involving the word "boy" somewhere?  "Trust the boy to lead you forward."  Beats the trial-and-error method.

Next I want to talk about one of my favorite rooms in the module, the Pillared Throne Room.  This is a huge room with eighty stone columns, with a throne on the South wall.  If a PC touches one of the columns, they magically become weightless, and start floating helplessly around the room.  There is a gentle breeze that pushes them towards a pair of devil faces on the NE and NW sides of the room, each of which teleport the PC to other locations.

This is a fun trap.  The imagery is whimsical, and it's a lot more creative than the usual spike pit trap.  It's not exactly deadly (though the locations it teleports you to can be), and it's slow enough that the other PCs can scramble to rescue you with lassos or spells.  Overall, it's a great trap.

However, I'm unsure about how it gets triggered within the narrative.  The description says, "any character who touches a pillar with or without intent" triggers the trap and floats upward.  Like I mentioned above, different players describe their actions differently.  Some players will specifically mention touching a column, but others are just going to say "I walk toward the throne."

Arbitrarily telling a player that they touched a column seems unfair.  You don't know if they're the kind of character who brushes every wall, or who keeps their hands in their pockets out of fear of triggering a trap.  Do you just pick a PC at random?  Is there any way to ask them if they've touched a column without making it clear that it's some sort of trap?

My fix: Give them a reason to want to touch a column.  Have the columns encrusted with expensive looking jewels (actually colored glass, but you can't tell without prying one off).  Touching a jewel, even with the tip of a knife, triggers the trap.  Also, just for the fun visual, have them blow up like Violet Beauregarde (the magic makes their clothes expand too) and bounce off the columns like a pachinko machine on their way to the devil faces.

Finally, I want to discuss the infamous Face of the Great Green Devil trap in the module's first hallway.  I don't know if this trap even works any more, because it's so well known.  It has to have reached "It Was His Sled" status in D&D circles.  But its reputation as a party killer doesn't make sense to me.  To be clear - I'm not bothered by the fact that it's an instant death trap, I'm bothered by killer DMs who allow entire parties to wander into the thing.

The idea - at least when I see it described by other people - is that the first person enters the mouth, thinking it's a secret tunnel.  He dies, but the other party members just see him disappear into the darkness, so they follow and die too.  Devious, simple, and early enough in the dungeon that you still have enough night left to find a better module to run.

Except the description as printed in the module doesn't necessarily imply a TPK.  Here is the actual text from the original AD&D module, which hasn't changed much in the modern version:

The Face of the Great Green Devil: The other fork of the path leads right up to an evil-appearing devil face set in mosaic at the corridor's end. (Show your players Graphic # 6). The face has a huge O of a mouth; it is dead black. The whole area radiates evil and magic if detected for. The mouth opening is similar to a (fixed) sphere of annihilation, but it is about 3' in diameter - plenty of room for those who wish to leap in and be completely and forever destroyed.

I've seen two misinterpretations.  One is that the mouth is a tunnel leading to the actual sphere, but because the inside of the mouth is magical darkness, the rest of the party don't see victim get disintegrated.  Except the description doesn't mention a tunnel.  The description implies that the darkness is the sphere.

The other misinterpretation I've seen is that sticking any body part in the mouth instantly disintegrates you, but to the rest of the party, you look like you just teleported, leading them to follow suit.  But unless I'm missing something, there is nothing in there that implies that either.

Look, I know Gary Gygax designed this dungeon to kill off high level characters, in order to put them in their place.  But going strictly by the text, that particular trap is open to interpretation.  The way I read it, it is just as believable that the rest of the party sees the victim die, and knows they are dead.  It's actually a pretty good way of showing the rest of the party how deadly the dungeon is, so they are that much more careful.

Plus, the way a Sphere of Annihilation works is a bit nebulous as well.  My question:  Does touching the thing instantly disintegrate your entire body, clothes and all?  Or does it only disintegrate the part that touches it?  If I touch it with my finger, do I lose the finger or my life?  If I crawl into the mouth head first, does the party just see my body go limp as my head disintegrates?

To answer this, I looked up both the AD&D and 5e versions of the sphere.  Here's what the AD&D DM guide has to say:

A sphere of annihilation is a globe of absolute blackness, a ball of nothingness 2' in diameter. A sphere is actually a hole in the continuity of the multiverse, a void. Any matter that comes in contact with a sphere is instantly sucked into the void, gone, utterly destroyed - even wishes and similar magicks have no effect!

And here's the updated description from 5e:

This 2-foot diameter black sphere is a hole in the multiverse, hovering in space and stabilized by a magical field surrounding it. The sphere obliterates all matter it passes through and all matter that passes through it. Artifacts are the exception. Unless an artifact is susceptible to the damage from a sphere of annihilation, it passes through the sphere unscathed. Anything else that touches the sphere but isn't wholly engulfed and obliterated by it takes 4d10 force damage.

That's actually a pretty big change.  So originally, touching the sphere meant you were sucked into it, like a black hole. The party would likely see this happen, and I can't imagine it looking like a positive thing.  You might start to enter the sphere under your own power, but once you're a few inches in, you're suddenly pulled in the rest of the way.  The difference in how you move won't be subtle to those watching.

But the 5e version describes the sphere differently.  It says that it only destroys what touches it, and even spells out what happens if something touches it without being totally engulfed.  You are not going to be totally engulfed at once by a three foot sphere, unless you take a running leap at it.  Some part of your body is going to touch it first.  When the party sees you take that 4d10 force damage, they're not going to want to follow suit.

My fix:  Just don't act like a 10-year old on a power trip.  The text of this trap doesn't actually need fixing, it just needs to be interpreted differently.  Have the first PC to touch it lose a finger.  If they jump into the mouth head first, make sure the rest of the party sees what happens and make it look painful.  Even if you decide to go with the original "black hole" version, describe it in a way that discourages the rest of the party from repeating the mistake.

"As you touch the darkness of the Devil's mouth, your fingers seem to elongate as they are pulled into the void.  You feel your entire body being dragged by an overwhelming force.  Your skin is ripped from your fingers, your eyes pulled from their sockets, and you barely have time to scream before you are completely drawn into the inky blackness, never to return.  Not even your soul is able to escape the relentless pull of this shadowy vacuum, dooming you to an eternity of darkness."

Hell, maybe even have the Devil face belch for comedic effect.  Hopefully the rest of the party won't see this and say, "That looks like fun, me next!"

But patching this module one trap at a time is like trying to stop a flood with a sponge.  If I were to run the module myself, this is what I would do.

My Overhaul:

"You have been hired by your guild to oversee the excavation of the Tomb of Horrors.  Your guild has hired fifty Dwarven miners to explore the tomb and uncover its secrets."

In my version of the Tomb of Horrors, the established PCs might never enter the tomb at all.  Instead, they manage a party of expendable henchmen, using sheer numbers and brute force to explore every inch of the dungeon.  This way they get to see most of the deaths without a TPK ending the session early, and without losing beloved characters they've been playing for years.

The Dwarven mining company consists of forty fighters, five rogues, and five wizards.  Feel free to play with that ratio, but use the same three pregens for all the miners.  I'd say make the pregens about 10th level.  Or use the sidekick rules from the Essentials box - these don't need to be full characters.

The PCs decide how many miners go into the tomb at a time, and what combination of classes.  The rest of the miners, along with the PCs, set up camp outside the tomb.  They are given sending stones to communicate with the miners currently inside the tomb.  The explorers stay in constant contact with the PCs, letting them know which way they're going and how they defeated certain traps.  The PCs are free to go in themselves at any time, and might even have to in order to defeat the final boss.

Give the players a spreadsheet to record the miners who are sent into the dungeon.  Have columns for Name, Class, Gender, and Fate.  Have the players come up with the names as they send them in.  Use the Fate column to record their gruesome deaths and career-ending injuries.

The miners are brave, but they're not stupid.  Don't let the players get too cavalier about sending them into obvious death traps.  Warn the players that for every fallen miner, a reward will be paid to their family.  This comes out of the final payment to the PCs. Challenge them to finish the module with the fewest possible deaths.  When the module is finished, reward them based on puzzles solved and surviving miners.

But wait, there's more!  On the way to the tomb, the miner caravan has to pass through a forest protected by fey spirits.  They are stopped by dryad guards and brought before the Forest Queen.  The Queen is supportive of their plan to defeat the evil in the tomb, because the tomb's encroaching miasma was causing her trees to wither.  The Queen sends a fairy emissary with them.

This fairy companion accompanies the miners into the tomb.  She can't help them fight or solve any puzzles, but if the party is completely stuck she can drop hints based on fey intuition.  She can't cast spells, but she can be used as a light source.  She is immune to most of the tomb's death traps (don't call attention to this, just always have her flying out of harm's way), and she can deliver messages to and from the tomb in case the sending stones are destroyed.  If there is a TPK in the tomb, she escapes and leads the next party to where the last party left off, warning them of how the previous explorers died.

Is that too tame for something with the word "Horrors" in the title?  Perhaps.  But played as written, a lot of groups don't end up making it far enough into the tomb to see a lot of horror.  At least with my method, you get to see more of the carnage.  Heck, you might even use this opportunity to dial the horror up to 11.

I know, Gary Gygax is rolling over in his grave, but he and I saw this game very differently.

Links:

DM Dave's Neverending Dungeon
https://www.patreon.com/posts/neverending-1-35922622

John Wick Presents - Worst Adventure of All Time
http://johnwickpresents.com/updates/the-worst-adventure-of-all-times/